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BECOMING INVISIBLE AND SUDDENLY APPEARING

from Speech 35, and the Practical and Theological Chapters, * Translated by Elpenor  * Greek Fonts


ELPENOR EDITIONS IN PRINT

Icon of the Christ and New Testament Reader
DIDN'T know yet, my Lord, that you exist, you who made me from clay and gave me all these goods. I didn’t know yet, that you yourself was my un-proud God and Lord. Because I had not received yet the grace to hear your voice in order to know you; you had not yet come and said mystically to me that ‘I am’. I was unworthy and unclean, still having the ears of my soul obstructed by the clay of sin, and my eyes under the command of disbelief and of the sense and fog of the passions. And I was seeing thus you my God, but without knowing, not having first believed that God, as much as possible being seen, he is being seen by some, I could not discern that God or God’s glory is this, which, sometimes thus, sometimes otherwise, is revealed, but the miracle being unusual astonished me and filled the whole of my soul and of my heart with joy, so that I was seeing even my very body partake of that ineffable grace. But I didn’t know yet clearly who you are, whom I was seeing.

γινόμενος ἀφανής καί αἴφνης φαινόμενος

Ἀλλ᾿ ὅμως οὔπω ἐγίνωσκον, Δέσποτα, ὅτι σύ ᾖς, ὁ ἀπό πηλοῦ πλάσας με, ταῦτά μοι πάντα χαρισάμενος τά καλά. Οὔπω ἔγνων ὅτι αὐτός σύ ὑπῆρχες ὁ ἀνυπερήφανος Θεός μου καί Κύριος. Οὔπω γάρ φωνῆς σου ἠξιώθην ἀκοῦσαι, ἵνα γνωρίσω σε, οὔπω ᾖς εἰπών μοι μυστικῶς ὅτι “Ἐγώ εἰμι”. Ἀνάξιος γάρ ἐτύγχανον καί ἀκάθαρτος, ἔτι τά ὦτα τῆς ψυχῆς ἐμπεφραγμένα τῷ τῆς ἁμαρτίας ἔχων πηλῷ καί τούς ὀφθαλμούς μου κεκρατημένους ὑπό ἀπιστίας καί ἀγνοίας καί τῆς τῶν παθῶν αἰσθήσεως καί ἀχλύος. Καί σέ μέν οὕτω τόν Θεόν μου ἑώρων· μή εἰδώς δέ μηδέ προπεπιστευκώς ὅτι Θεός, καθ᾿ ὅσον οἷόν τε ὁρᾶσθαι, ὁρᾶταί τινι, οὐκ ἐνενόουν ὅτι Θεός ἤ Θεοῦ δόξα ἐστί τό ποτέ μεν οὕτω μοι ποτέ δέ ἄλλως δεικνύμενον, ἀλλά τό μέν ἀσύνηθες κατέπληττέ με τοῦ θαύματος, χαρᾶς δέ ὅλην μου τήν ψυχήν ἐπλήρου καί τήν καρδίαν, ὡς καί αὐτό μου οἴεσθαί με τό σῶμα μεταλαμβάνειν τῆς χάριτος τῆς ἀφάτου ἐκείνης. Οὔπω δέ τό τίς ᾖς ὁ ὁρώμενος τρανῶς τότε ἐγίνωσκον.

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